I have to laugh at this programme they're currently showing Pontins in Southport. They used to have the Queen conventions there but stopped coz they started selling beer in plastic cups. The chalets used to have ants all over the place too. Anyway here's another joke for you guys :-)
It's a sunny morning in the Big Forest and the Bear family is just
Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He
into his small bowl. It is empty!
"Who's been eating my porridge?" he squeaks.
Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks
big bowl. It is also empty!
"Who's been eating my porridge?" he roars.
Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and
yells, "For Pete's sake, how many times do we have to go through this?
"It was Mummy Bear who go up first.
"It was Mummy Bear who woke everybody else in the house up.
"It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put
"It was Mummy Bear who went out into the cold early morning air to
"It was Mummy Bear who set the table.
"It was Mummy Bear who put the cat out, cleaned the litter box and
cat's water & food dish.
"And now that you've decided to come down stairs and grace me with your
presence.... listen good because I'm only going to say this one more
haven't made the @#*% porridge yet!!"