Wednesday 22 December 2004

Only tomorrow to go

Hello everyone - Apparently I'm gonna have my one month probation meeting tomorrow (sounds quite bad doesn't it??) - wish me luck though!!  I'm getting quite excited about xmas now coz I'm only working tomorrow and then I'm off until the 4th woohoo :-)  I keep checking that it is the 4th coz I know I'm gonna go back a day early LOL.........

Received a few more xmas cards today - one from a bloke from my old workplace - it was rather funny, which was nice and found out that one of my old work colleagues is working in the same building as me - cool!! 

Anyway I shall leave you with this - I read it at lunch time and thought 'that's kinda cool and I must put it in my journal' :-)  - Enjoy!!

16 THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN

by Dave Barry, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them

5. You should not confuse your career with your life

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 21.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers

13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

16. Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine . . . They start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

FINAL THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2030, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hope all goes well tomorrow.
Liked all your stuff.

Anonymous said...

YEA! Vacation time, I miss getting excited about that ;)  now it means the little one is home for 2 weeks!
I LOVE Dave Barry's columns, read it every sunday.  #13 is very true, but I think that #16 is my favorite ;)
Take it easy doll
xoxo~Bernadette

Anonymous said...

Yes, NEVER assume a woman is pregnant, and NEVER offer your congratulations until you're 100% sure!!  Had a friend offering his congratulations on my pregnancy years ago, when I was out clubbing!!  Needless to say, I wasn't pregnant, and I never wore that top again!!!
Sara   x

Anonymous said...

good entry I have enjoyed it very much ............Jules xxxxxxxxx
http://journals.aol.co.uk/jules19642001/Itsmylife/