Friday, 6 April 2007

Catch up

 everyone ~ how are you all?  Making the most of this gorgeous weather I hope??

Today I decided to go up to Bedford Street as it's opened up as part of the revamping of the town!!  So I went for a walk all along by the river and up the hill to town.  On the way I took a few photos in order to share them with you guys and thinking of my blog!!  As I was walking home though and came to the house that I've wanted to show you the batteries died :(  Damn camera!!  It may not be till next month that I can show you the pics as my camera batteries are so damn expensive!!  Don't think about leaving comments about rechargeable ones as mine takes a certain type which isn't rechargeable *rolls eyes*

I don't know what to think of this modernisation, I mean I guess on the surface it looks great bringing the city into the whatever century we are in *blushes for not knowing that lol* (Is it the 21st??) But I feel kinda sad as the old style buildings are either gone or being overlooked by this new shopping centre that will be open in Autumn.

We are getting paid the lowest wages in the country (or at least that's how it feels) and they are putting in shops that wouldn't look out of place on the streets of London but to me they just don't look right down here!!  It's probably coz I couldn't afford to shop in them so therefore won't be setting foot in them.  I guess these new shops will be handy at xmas when you can't think of what to get someone but even so...............

Sorry peeps I just had to moan about this!!  And whilst I'm in the moaning mood, even though the weather is too nice to be moaning, let's talk about Wednesday!!  I texted my brother during the day to find out if it was still going ahead as I had heard nothing about who was picking me up.  Now my dearest father (please note the sarcasm) stated catergorically at the last meet up that as he works in Exeter he could pick me up saving Greg the journey of having to go into the city.  Fair enough!!  But I heard nothing from anybody!!

Greg texted me back saying yes it was going ahead and Dad was picking me up.  Fine I think yet slightly annoyed he hadn't contacted me to say what time he was picking me up.  So I ring his office (ok garage) and he says, "Your brother said he was picking you up."  Annoyance sets in so firm by this point that I bite back with "he's texted to say that you were picking me up."  He states again that Greg was picking me up and I'm seething by this point so say I'll ring him and I hang up.

Ring Greg and it goes through to answer machine ~ leave message saying something along the lines of dad changing his mind and that he says your picking me up, ring me back please.

I sit at work for about another 45 minutes seething and angry that Dad could do this!!  The one thing he said he would do and he's gone and let me down AGAIN!!  Jeez............The phone rang and it was a rep telling me that one of the client's had passed away and was asking how much he would have to pay on the final bill.  I was just changing screens and still seething about the business of the lift when I heard myself sigh.  The rep apologised, clearly he had heard it too.  I cringed at the thought that he thought I was sighing coz of him.  I apologised very hastily.

I get home eventually and wait for Greg to pick me up.  He did so at about 6.10pm.  Dad had said when I rung him that he was running late too, but because of him Greg hadn't even had chance to go home and change.  Anyway we get to the restaurant and unfortunately Dad and M his wife is in the car park.

I was dreading it so much I felt very guarded and didn't want to be nice but I did find myself start to relax afer a while.  We had a drink and then went in the restaurant bit for our meal.  This woman wanted a starter but Greg and I were like main course straight away.  I think she was a bit put out about it (lol tough)  We all had carvery for our main meal.  I had the mixture of both beef and pork (can you believe they didn't do lamb?  What an outrage!!) The meal was fine but it was after that I was starting to get the whole picture of why the misses was here!!

You see as I said before my dad works in a garage and knows a lot about cars.  My brother loves cars too so guess what they talked about?  Yep and therefore the misses was here to keep me company as I can't talk about cars don't know anything about them!!  But I found that wrong and made me more determined not to talk to her and listen to what the blokes were saying.  Due to this stubborness of mine I got bored and wished more so that I wasn't there.

I came to the conclusion that he probably wouldn't miss me if I weren't there!!  Why doesn't he pay me the kind of attention like he does Greg?  He talks to him about his work, people he knows, holidays, etc.  Is it because I'm just a mere admin worker, who can't afford to go on holiday??!!  Therefore have nothing in common with him.  Why does he not enquire about my life and what I've been up to?  Does he not want to know?  Or does he just think that if he's nice to me buys a couple of drinks and a good meal that he's buying my relationship?  At the end of the day my brother can't carry on the family name, only I can!!  If he wants grandkids he better change his ways and fast!!  Sounds harsh huh?  I just want to hurt him and I know that's not very nice way of talking but I have to make him feel what I feel and perhaps then he might understand.

By the end of the night at least this woman had got him to understand that I don't make as much money as they do and therefore cannot just drop everything and go for a weekend away with them.  There is talk that the next meet up will be at their house with what sounds like Greg fixing their computer and me having to make small talk with this cow!!  I tell you she is such an empty headed ejit!!  Every conversation was "Oh i was very thristy and couldn't believe I had drunk that much" followed by annoying laughter!!  (I'm wondering if this is coming across like a moody teenager ~ well I don't mean it too!!) It's just they wind me up the wrong way and I have to moan or it festers!!

Well I have got to stop moaning in this journal lol.............will post the convention stuff soon that's not moaning!!  I miss my convention buddies :(

Tomorrow as you already know I'm off to see mum and depending on stuff I am off to see Trina on Sunday.

Have a good easter peeps xx

p.s throat is all better cleared up the day after the last entry ~ cool huh??

thanks to Missie for the easter graphic and I can't remember who did my sig (sorry xx)


jeadie05 said...

Oh Jen at least you went ,and got through it well done ..have a Blessed Easter dear Jan xx

oddb0dkins said...

You know what they say: you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family. I think you'd be better off not going to these meetings Jen, if they just make you angry and upset. Life's too short for all that. B. x

rdautumnsage said...

I'm not one to stand in the midst of families......but hon perhaps you should cancel out the next meet. Maybe then your father would get the idea your missed. I had a father who would only talk to me while I drank with him drink for drink. Needless to say he always ended up under the table and I never really got to know him. Keep your chin up kiddo your a wonderful person. Too bad your father is so self centered or he would see the wonderful qualities you do have. Those to me are greater gifts by far than money ever will be. (Hugs) Indigo

wldconnie said...

Just found you again! Sorry I have not read your journal lately but it got lost somewhere! Fathers who are not interested happens a lot in my family. My 3 kids keep in touch with him and they rarely see him. It was 7 yrs since Andy saw his dad when they last met up this year! Well done for going and trying to make contact. Does he deserve you! probably not but as my kids say you only have one dad! Love Conniex

katie39041 said...

I am so sorry!!! along with other comments on here, i would not be going to the next meeting with your Father and his giggly missus.Life is for living Jenny, you have a mum you dont need a father who left you while you and your brother grew up. I have to ask who contacted who? You have tried to build up a relationship with your father. Do not feel guilty for walking away he needs to make more of an effort with his daughter and not leave her on the sidelines so to speak. I can not wait to hear what went on at your convention. a mere snippit is not enough jenny!!! how can you leave us dangling like this.
lots of love

gazker said...

Jen, My heart bleeds for you in this situation, try not too feel too bad as your Dad preferes conversation with your brother than you, i'ts not Gregs fault. Have you ever thought about having your Dad round for supper or lunch so you can do things on your terms as you will be calling the shots, or is that not possible?
I hate to have to tell you this but unless Greg is gay, it will be him carrying on the family name if his partner has kids not you. If you marry you won't be carrying on the family name.
Have a great Easter.......... Gaz

labdancer51 said...

It must be really hard for you to be a situation like this Jen. On the rare occasions that I saw my Mother she felt like someone I only barely knew and the atmosphere was awful. I hope your Dad does try to get to know the real you as it would be a great loss for him if he doesn`t. Take care.

Love Sandra xxx

elainey2465 said...

So sorry Jen about the situation with your Dad - he just probably doesnt know how to behave with you - some men dont know how to talk to their daughters - and only find it easier to talk to other men folk. Its a shame hun. He is missing out on knowing a lovely person! Laine xxxx

jaymact1 said...

So sorry Jen that you had such a bad evening there is nothing worse than sitting feeling out of the loop I hate that sort of thing. Hope you have had a great visit with your Mun and sister. LOve Jan.

jlocorriere05 said...

I'm sorry you didn't have a good time with your dad Jenny. I think I'd make excuses not to see them for a while. It's not nice feeling left out of things. I'm looking forward to hearing about the convention. You moan all you want, it's your journal! Have a great Easter! Jeannette xx  

springangel235 said...

So sorry things did not go well with your Dad...hope things will change.
Moan anytime, it helps to talk about things, get it out...
Hope, you too, have a beautiful Easter...many hugs,

irisclyde said...

All I can say that as a divorced parent, I feel really guilty at what 'kids' have to suffer because of their parents! I think at the time you don't think. My ex is pretty self-centred & doesn't see my boys much, well, apart from the fact that one of them isn't in the country anyway. It's all very difficult, this business with relationships and it's tough for you being on your own. At least you have nice friends. I think I over compensate by seeing J a lot! Hope you're having a nice w/e!

funnyface0s0 said...

Families hey Jen, tut tut.    Jus go with your feelings.  Hope you've had a nice day with Trina today :o)
Luv Jayne x

sarajanesmiles said...

Shame about the photies, wants to see them!
I get everything you said about your Dad m'dear.
It does get easier with time, but he has to make the effort and show you that he cares and wants to know you.  I hope that this is all nerves on his part, and that next time things will be a little better.  
Sara   x

haysiefantaysie2 said...

sounds like you've been having a brilliant time - great pics too!  As for the little git you work with - swop his deoderant for some spraymount adhesive (be great if he sprayed his privates with it  <evil grin>  lol)  take care, lynne...errr..  I mean.....   Jessica!  (It's going to take a while to get used to this new name!)  xxxxx