Hi everyone,
I'm not sure why I'm adding an entry today, just feels that i need to get things off my chest coz if I don't they will stay there and fester!!
I've had YET another bad day at work!! I don't know why it was a bad day. I didn't walk to work dreading going in, well not as badly as it has been but as soon as I entered that room and sat at my desk despair filled me!!
I don't think it's my colleagues anymore (although they don't help!!) I think it's me and my attitude towards things. I may have said that Friday was better but only after I had gone to the loo's and had a good cry about it all. Admittedly I was suffering with the hormones too but I couldn't hold in my emotions that day, not matter how hard I tried. When I got back to my desk things were better!!
I think on some level now i am worried ~ for what?? We have our appraisals coming up and I KNOW something is gonna get mentioned. It just amazes me how we can go from working okay to absolutely abmissally!! Not that the work isn't getting done coz it is and faster than ever before from the looks of things.
Maybe it's my confidence that is holding me back. I've always suffered with my damn confidence and knowing that I don't do the job as well as I could probably doesn't help!! I'm now finding that I'm slower than what I thought I was!!
At the end of the day this just stems to me having a damn bad month!! I agree with Caff I'm looking forward to February and hoping it will bring some smiles with it. I don't wanna get to that stage where I'm ringing in sick, when there's nothing wrong with me just to avoid it!!
Perhaps I think too much, if i just let it wash over me I might be able to cope better!! I feel like i did last thursday when you know there's something wrong but you can't put your finger on what that is!! And now I'm just babbling.................
I'm not sure this is helping but thanks for listening peeps...............One day the smiles will return I'm sure of it lol
8 comments:
Sorry your day was bad Jenny. I'm sure it'll all come right for you. Once the appraisals are out of the way it'll be easier for you to cope with work, appraisals do cause a lot of pressure! Jeannette xx http://journals.aol.co.uk/jlocorriere05/Welcometomytravels/
I think you are going through a difficult time Jen ,once your appraisals are out of the way you will feel better ,dont put your self down ,you did well last time and will again I'm sure ..love Jan xx
Sorry you're feeling like this...hope your week gets better..
Lyn
maybe you've got a touch of 'seasonal affective disorder' a friend of mine suffers with this and she says that january is the worst month for it, she gets depressed and weepy even though things are fine.
have recently had the same problem with our pc, we had to reformat everything, bloody thing lol
kerry
You're bound to have a few rough days along with the smooth. I agree with the other comments, once your appraisals are out of the way things will look brighter.
Of course, what you really need is a couple of gigs to go to to let off steam.
Keep smiling jen. B. x
Of course the smiles will return m'dear.
Until they do, here's a few from me to tide you over... :o) :o) :o)
I felt like you're feeling all last week, am pretty sure it was just the usual hormone thing, but it's still miserable when you feel that way isn't it.
I do hope that things improve for you soon Jenny, like everyone else has said, maybe after the appraisals are over.
((((( for you )))))
Sara x
Sorry to hear you are so down hope you pep up real soon. One good thing about being older you don't get the hormone thingie. Love Joan.
Oh blimey Jen I have been just like you lately - if you see my journal you'll see what I mean - I'm the same as you I feel like I'm not good enough - no confidence. Anyway!! Your brilliant just you remember that!! And keep smiling love Laine xx
http://journals.aol.co.uk/elainey2465/art-degree/
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